God... my exceeding joy...

Send out your light and your truth; let them lead me;

let them bring me to your holy hill and to your dwelling

Then I will go to the the altar of God, to God my exceeding joy,

and I will praise you with the lyre, O God, my God.

Psalm 43:3-4 ESV

Verses from a Joy Scripture Reading Plan...

In it I see... He is my exceeding joy...

His light... His truth... lead me to Him... my joy...

And suddenly... I see Him BIG... INFINITE...

Bigger than any one could ever reveal...

I see why... He calls so many...

to write... witness... teach...

who He is...

Because one... even a few... could never... write enough... teach enough... share enough... to reveal all that He is...

God... my exceeding joy...

Is He your joy...? how does He look to you... through the joy that is Him...?

new... it just keeps pressing...

New... it just keeps pressing...

Pressing me forward... deeper... deeper...

The new experience of writing... leading... a Bible study...
now presses... to make it available to others...

New levels of vulnerability...
new challenges in writing...
cleaning up words written...
making them clear for others to take and lead...
while not knowing if anyone ever will...

Yes... new... it just keeps pressing...

"Behold, I am making all things new."

Revelation 21:5 ESV

Do you feel the pressing of new... in you...?

narrow margin...

Walking one morning this week... feeling the pressure of limited time...
desiring to be ahead in the writing of devos... and Bible study days...
I brought my angst to Him...

As soon as I did... the story of the widow and her son came to mind... the one Elijah was sent to for help during the three year drought...

When he arrived she was about to make her final meal... there was just enough flour... just enough oil... for one more meal for her and her son... then they planned to die...

And Elijah said to her, "Do not fear; go and do as you have said.

But first make me a little cake of it and bring it to me, and afterward

make something for yourself, and your son. For thus says the Lord,

the God of Israel, 'The jar of flour shall not be spent, and the jug of oil

shall not be empty, until the day that the Lord 

sends rain upon the earth.'"

1 Kings 17:13-14 ESV

So she went and did as Elijah said... and she and he and her household ate for many days... the jar of flour was not spent... neither did the jug of oil become empty...

And I'm sure this widow must have felt the same sort of angst as me...

no surplus of oil and flour... just enough for each day...

from jars that looked almost empty...

No guarantee... but the word of the Lord... that there would be more...

My flour and oil... words... teachings... insight... they have come... 

but just for the day... the week... the moment...

and me feeling almost empty in between...

No guarantee of more... just the understanding of His call to continue...

I discern greed in my desire for devos written days ahead.... 

seeking rest... and ease... in a place of excess...

the angst a sign of little faith... 

Why can't I rest...? with words just coming as needed...?

The lesson of the oil and flour... just enough for the day... an exercise in trust...

The same lesson learned by the Israelites in the wilderness... the manna coming just for the day...

The same way Jesus teaches His disciples to pray... Give us this day our daily bread... not a week's worth... or month's worth... but just for today...

God tests... stretches faith... by calling us to live a season with narrow margin...

An uncomfortable place... but one I'm becoming at rest in... as I practice thanks... rather than greed...

What in your life do you want more of...? where have you not been thankful for the just enough? where is He stretching your faith... with  narrow margin...?

Father God... thank You for the words for today...

and the time that is just enough... Thank You...

for stretching my faith... teaching me to live...

with narrow margin... and be content... with daily bread...

a new release...

A New Release... A Step of Faith...

I've written these words several times today... taking the next step... sending emails... with fear and trembling... announcing The Heart of Bethlehem...

And I realize... I've recently embraced... a new release...

Releasing... fear...
by focusing... on Him...

And in the release... I find myself... strangely filled...

Releasing... my husband...
from expectations he could never meet... was not created to fulfill... has left me more fully dependent on Him... making the way for a more solid... peaceful... joyful... marriage for me...

Releasing... writing into the world...
removes fear... when I pour it out for Him... and not for me...

Releasing... my life... my heart... my hurts... to Him...
I find myself... at peace... able to rest with what comes...

Release... it is a step of faith... and growth...
a necessary step... to embrace...

Find rest, O my soul, in God alone;

my hope comes from him.

He alone is my rock and my salvation;

he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.

My salvation and my honor depend on God;

he is my mighty rock, my refuge.

Trust in him at all times, O people;

pour out your hearts to him,

for God is our refuge.

Psalm 62:5-8

taking the next step... with fear and trembling...

OK... here I am... at the end of a new... that leads to next steps...

The putting out into deep water... has brought me to this place... where steps are taken... with fear... and trembling...

I don't even know what words to use... so here it goes...

I've published a book...
and its available...
for purchase...

The Heart of Bethlehem

A Twenty-five Day Journey of Faith

for the Christmas Season

An e-book... so it's only available digitally... that can be found at...
WestBow Press...
and other sellers of books electronic...
Amazon...
GoogleBooks...
and hopefully more to come... before Thanksgiving...

Humbly... I come before you with this announcement... feeling vulnerable... exposed... and a little nauseated...

And I wonder... Why...?

This is not a process that has been taken lightly... and has been a very long time in the making...

But to be here... in this place... with a self-published book... wondering what I was thinking... all the inspiration... the surety... of His guidance... and direction... seems to have been wiped clean from my memory...

So here... I find myself... in a position... where self-promotion... is necessary... to let others know... what He means to me... and how... they might know Him too...

The Heart of Bethlehem... a book of devotionals... December 1 through Christmas Day...

Scriptures to look up and read... walk the reader through the Nativity story...

Prayer to begin... and end... with thoughts to share in between... questions to consider...

Geared for both Believers... and those who don't...

Perhaps you will consider it... for yourself... your family... or as a gift to share with others...

At this point... there is time to review... and consider if it is worthwhile... to share with those who don't know Him... and why He came... as a babe...

And if you feel so moved... I invite you to write a review... on Amazon... or wherever...

I've already used more words... than I thought I would in making this announcement at this table of faith... but you who come here... you know many of my struggles... and my heart for Him...

All day... I've been contemplating... exactly how this would come out... and the only two words... that came to mind were... fear and trembling...

Looking for the verse... that uses these words... I discovered... they came right before another verse I often lean on... when in doubt...

...work out your salvation with fear and trembling; 

for it is God who is at work in you, 

both to will and to work for His good pleasure.

2 Philippians 2:12-13 NASB

Whatever will moved me to work for this to happen... by faith I'm believing it is Him at work in me... and pray that it pleases Him...

From you... I would also ask for prayer... as I venture out to let others know... that I would have words... wisdom... and an attitude centered on pouring this out... for Him... with thanksgiving...


[Related fare...
in the Word
embracing... hard...
a day of new... and unknown...]

off track... or divine detour...?

A simple focused task... file the 2012 tax return... went completely off track... when one box after another had to be moved... to complete the mission...

Two and a half hours later... through tears... trash... and pages... and pages... of notes... and studies... the last 15 or so years of my past... had been waded through...

The many notes... and writings... revealed... that my entire faith journey... has included writing as an expression of faith...
letters to family and friends...
poems...
articles...
devotionals...
Some completed... some not... some shared... some stuck in a box... for more than ten years...

Some of the pages... I remember writing... with passion stirred... and a desire to share... but fear... kept me from moving forward... with an offer to speak... or... submit for publication...

Many of the pieces... have been sent as Christmas cards... or included in a church Advent book...

But the number... of writings... I just let sit... in a box... brought to mind that servant... who buried his talent in the back yard... ugh...!

Of course... just yesterday... I read almost half of a book... Love Does... whose primary message is... say Yes to God... by doing... following through...

I believe... a reminder has been given... a gentle nudge... a push... to do more... with the words He gives...

A divine detour... in the middle of afternoon chores... to open my eyes... and heart... to what He has given... and the call to use it... not bury it... despite... fear... experience... or ...qualification...

Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms.

1Peter 4:10

What about you... do you have a talent buried...? 

Maybe it's time to dig it up... dust it off... and use it... boldly... for Him... (after all... it is... His...)

a humbling encouragement

I received some encouragement today... the warm and fuzzy kind...

A run-in with a friend... she said very gracious things about these writings... these oddball posts that make me feel naked as I stand before her...

She praised way beyond my comfort level... and I said... Praise Him!

A very unexpected encouragement...

Yet later... as I thought... I received a spur... I should have questioned further...

So grateful that she finds blessing in my words... but what about His...? I should have asked... Do these words make you hunger for Him... for His Word...?

That is the purpose... the mission... not to turn people to me or my words... but to Him... increase a hunger for seeing His Word made flesh in their's...

The only way to see... is by eating... His...

What about you... those who grace this table with your presence... do you hunger for more of Him...? because of what you've eaten here...?

That is my hope... that is my prayer...

He must become greater; I must become less.

John 3:30

writing hungry

Writing...
re-writing the essence of writing...

Writing and re-writing words in hopes of making others hunger...
hunger for His Word...

Refining words that others might turn to the perfect Word...
He is found in His Word...

My own hunger increases...
my spirit yearns for more...

More of Him...
more life...
more...

Maybe His purpose in my writing is my hunger...
drawing me ever nearer and deeper into Him...

As the deer pants for streams of water,

so my soul pants for you, O God.

Psalm 42:1

Do you hunger for Him...?

for His Word...?