so much to do... so much joy...

On the drive home from the shop...
my brain spins... with all I have to do...
bills to pay...
ministry to tend to...
dinner to cook...
blog to write...
Bible study to plan and prepare...
plants to water...
the list goes on...
but all I feel is...
JOY...

I really don't get it...
it seems so incongruent...
to my reality...
and how I would've felt...
before...

Before what...?
Can't put words to it...
before He freed me up to more of Him...
more faith in His work in my life...
more faith in His strength to do all He fills my life with...
more trust in Him to get it done...
more obedience to His Spirit...

Joy...
just more confirmation...
of walking with Him...

Offer right sacrifices, and put your trust in the Lord.

There are many who say, "Who will show us some good?

Lift up the light of your face upon us, O Lord!"

You have put more joy in my heart than they have

when their grain and wine abound.

Psalm 4:5-7 ESV

Trust and obedience...

a life lived for Him...

unexpected...

incongruent...

irrational...

joy... joy... joy...

Please understand... this unreasonable joy... 

that's been bubbling up in my heart the last couple of years... 

has come from years... decades... of pursuing His Way...

It is the result of much struggle... much failure... much repentance... much anxiety... on the road to trusting Him...

But let me tell you... it's worth it...

If you are struggling today... keep on keeping on...

continue offering right sacrifices...

giving Him your time... energy... life...

I hope to encourage you with these words today...

that joy will come... 

He promises it...

His joy... at our pursuit of Him... becomes our strength...

So I wonder... is this joy even mine...

maybe it's His... fueling me with strength...

to do all He's put in my life...

And do not be grieved, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.

Nehemiah 8:10 ESV