rest... in His love...

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear.

For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears

has not been perfected in love. We love because he first loved us.

1 John 4:18-19 ESV

My morning starts off different than most...

a flurry of activity...

making morning coffee...

unloading the dishwasher...

loading the dishwasher...

cleaning the kitchen...

left a mess the night before...

The alarm to wake my husband...

goes off in the kitchen...

I'm still in bed... asleep...

Usually I'm up before him... 

I'm his alarm...

but I have to set one or I forget...

The strange noise wakes me...

It's time for you to get up...

he doesn't move...

I roll out of bed...

into the kitchen...

still in nightgown...

usually workout clothes come first...

The flurry of activity begins...

besides the kitchen...

other things come to mind...

getting dressed...

making the bed...

starting laundry...

shopping online for Christmas...

I pursue these activities... with a bit of guilt...

this is not how I like to start my day...

the coffee making... yes...

but the rest...

and the shopping...

I feel like it's distracting me from Him...

He is the One I sit with first in my mornings...

with coffee... devotional... prayer journal...

praise... and His Word...

a time to sit... rest... begin the day right...

So this morning...

everything felt wrong...

out of order... out of sorts...

but I continued with the flurry...

until it felt complete...

I sat with Him...

feeling stirred...

like I failed Him...

put Him on the back burner...

until I read...

It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you;

he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.

Deuteronomy 31:8 ESV

He was with me in the flurry...

in the out of sorts waking...

He went before me in this day...

beginning with online Christmas shopping...

The fear I felt... came from my flesh...

my desire to do things right...

to please Him...

I realized as I sat... pondering His presence... His love...

Instead of being fearful... I should be thankful... and joyful...

He made the way... to get things done...

things I didn't know how they would happen...

After the guilt-ridden flurry and fear of failing Him...

I find myself filled with thanks...

resting in His love for me...

His direction in my day...

even if it seems off to me...

He was before and with...

and loving me all the way...

Father God... help me to remember the lesson of resting in Your love...

trusting You are near... going before me in my day...

no matter how it goes...